My Nemesis

It is amazing the way that sneaky little being self-doubt pops up when and where you least expect him.

Just when you thought all was good in the world, he steps out of the shadows. As you walk along, he whispers nasty nothings in your ear. You turn and glare at him, relegating him to sliding along the walls of the scummy stores you pass on your way home, the shadows skidding across his empty eyes. But before you have time to banish him completely, with a quickened step he catches you and continues his depressive tirade of doubtful thoughts.

Sometimes I stop suddenly, turning to shout at him to leave me alone. He skulks off to hang out with his low life mates Pity and Jealousy, at the local Starbucks, or wherever similarly bad feelings get together to drink bitter coffee.

But before you know it, like a mouse that you swear you just saw across the other side of the room, he is right there in front of you again.

Today I had my first thought of 'am I going to spend the rest of my life in fear of one day being found slowly decomposing into the sofa only because the power company finally realise I haven't paid the bill for over a year?'

The neighbours will be quoted as saying 'we only really saw her when she occasionally put her piles of newspaper bundled in twine, out for recycling, as well as let the 45 cats out for a quick wee'.

You will be pleased to know, however, after two laaaarge glasses of wine, I kicked self-doubt's arse in a 'crouching tiger, hidden dragon' style kung-ku fight. Entirely in slow motion, of course.

Nomadic Emma lives to see another day as the 'super singleton'.